Sunday, December 20, 2009

Forgiveness??

I read something earlier today that really stopped me in my tracks. So, I started thinking about forgiveness.

I know that I need to forgive my 'brother' if he wrongs me. Do I need to go so far as to let him know that I have forgiven him? Would that just open me up for more hurt? Should I wait until he asks for my forgiveness before letting him know?

Maybe he wasn't even talking about me... or the incident. But what if he was?

I'm really torn here.

I do not want this person in my life - AT ALL!!! Yet, there is a part of me that thinks I should reach out to him & let him know that I have forgiven him. Then there is that other side of me that hesitates because I just don't want to open myself up to anymore hurt. If I were to reach out to him & he's not even talking about me, then what if he doesn't think he's done anything wrong?

Please keep me in prayer as I contemplate this.

Many blessings,
Allison

1 comment:

Criss T said...

If it was something relatively minor - that resulted in hurt feelings - then I would let it go. The person may not even realize that a transgression took place, so nothing would be gained.

If it is major - perhaps a 3rd party would be able to convey your message of forgiveness. It's less likely to appear as an invitation to reopen the relationship, and in the end it may allow the transgressor to forgive herself.

There is the risk of getting the response "What did I ever do? You're mistaken..." But with a 3rd party you could specify that you don't want to know the offenders response, if any.

Just some thoughts. There's a good website on the topic of Biblical conflict resolution that may help: www.peacemakers.net.