Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Never thought of it that way

I am afflicted with clinical depression. Have been for years. Some days are worse than others. I have been on medication for it for quite some time now.

I used to be ashamed. Felt like I was less than. Weak. Useless. I wouldn't tell anyone that I suffered from depression let alone admit I was on medication. There's a stigma, you know. In general, people think you're weak. In the church, you often hear that you don't pray enough; that you're not close to God.

Thankfully, God brought an amazing friend into my life that helped dispel those myths. She showed me that it in admitting I need help that I can gain strength.

For me, relief comes in the form of a little white pill. 1 & 1/2 of them to be exact. What some people may see as a crutch, I see as a blessing.

A blessing?

Yes, I said a blessing. Why can't God have had man create anti-depressants to help? I mean, we see other medications as blessings, why can't this be?

I know I'll have some out there who will disagree with me. That's OK - we'll just have to agree to disagree. Until you are truly afflicted with depression, you cannot know what it is to be in that deep, dark place that seems inescapable.

Many blessings,

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Song of Solomon 6:3

I don't even know how it started... actually as I type this, I just remembered.

It was our 11th wedding anniversary. I decided to be cheesy traditional and buy The Mayor a gift that represented the anniversary. You know, 11th is the STEEL anniversary. I came across a nice wedding band with an inscription inside which read "I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine". I liked it, it was in my price range and The Mayor needed a new wedding band (since he had lost so much weight since we were first married).

Here we are, getting ready to celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary and we still cling to this Bible verse. In fact, for Valentine's 2012 he had this beautiful painting created just for me.

It's beautiful!!! It was made in the colors of our bedroom. I cannot wait to find a place to display it. It will be a daily reminder of The Mayor's love for me. Of our marriage. Of the struggles we've encountered and the trials we have endured. To think that the word divorce was once in our vocabulary... and now, it's the furthest thing from our minds.

I'm not saying we have a perfect marriage... far from it. But I am saying that we are fully committed to making our marriage work. We have come a LONG way, but still have a way to go.

I love being loved.... I love being The Mayor's wife!

Many blessings,

Saturday, February 4, 2012

They really DO love eachother

Songbird & Slugger have a typical sibling rivalry relationship. The moment they wake up in the morning, they argue: who took the remote, who ate the last of the cereal, who's breathing whose air. This usually continues until its time for bed.

I can't say that my sisters & I had the best sibling relationship growing up, so I certainly didn't have unrealistic expectations for my own children. However, as they get older they seem to argue more. I guess hormones will do that.

This week, hope has been restored.

The family came home from school/work the other day. Due to my new work schedule, as they were headed IN the door, I was headed out. I think we had a 10 minute window of hello/goodbye. The Mayor came in the room while I was getting ready and said that Slugger had been physically bullied at school. Some hoodlum boy twisted Slugger's arm behind his back. What makes this worse is that Slugger wasn't the one who told us. SONGBIRD did!! She happened to be in the cafeteria when it happened. Thankfully, she had the wherewithal to inform the school guidance counselor. We have spoken to Slugger about the situation & the school. The incident has been handled.

The moral of my story is that when push comes to shove, my children WILL look out for one another. That is a comfort. I can't always be there (even though they think I have eyes in the back of my head).

Many blessings,