Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Never thought of it that way

I am afflicted with clinical depression. Have been for years. Some days are worse than others. I have been on medication for it for quite some time now.

I used to be ashamed. Felt like I was less than. Weak. Useless. I wouldn't tell anyone that I suffered from depression let alone admit I was on medication. There's a stigma, you know. In general, people think you're weak. In the church, you often hear that you don't pray enough; that you're not close to God.

Thankfully, God brought an amazing friend into my life that helped dispel those myths. She showed me that it in admitting I need help that I can gain strength.

For me, relief comes in the form of a little white pill. 1 & 1/2 of them to be exact. What some people may see as a crutch, I see as a blessing.

A blessing?

Yes, I said a blessing. Why can't God have had man create anti-depressants to help? I mean, we see other medications as blessings, why can't this be?

I know I'll have some out there who will disagree with me. That's OK - we'll just have to agree to disagree. Until you are truly afflicted with depression, you cannot know what it is to be in that deep, dark place that seems inescapable.

Many blessings,


Christa said...

You are always loved sister

BARBIE said...

Thank you for sharing. Several years ago, I was taking anti-depressants. I felt the same way as you used to, full of guilt and shame, afraid to tell anyone. I believe depressions is a real sickenss, an imbalance, and why not receive medical attention for it? An asthmatic would not stop taking her meds, neither would a diabetic. Thankfully, I have been medication free for a number of years. But as menopause hit, I find myself realing with highs and lows and may need to consult my physician again to balance my hormones.

Praying you are feeling well today, and know you are loved and accepted just as you are.