Thursday, April 2, 2015

Behind the mask

Recently, I was involved in a women's study at church. I signed up and was randomly put at a table to with 9 other women; 8 of whom were strangers.

We studied the book of James for 5 weeks. Really dug deep into the meat of the scripture.

As you know, I don't do well with new situations. I hate having to put myself out there. Sure once I get acclimated I'm fine. But its getting to that point that scares me. I mean, what if people don't like me? What if I say the wrong thing? What if I live in the 'wrong' part of the county? What if I don't drive the right car?

What if? What if? What if?

Let me tell you - those "what if"s can drive a person crazy!!!!

Clearly we all signed up for this group because we were interested in learning more about our Savior. There you go - a common interest.

As the weeks went by, not only did we learn more about James, his message and his brother, Jesus, but we slowly dropped our masks. I wasn't the only one. All of us came in feeling like we needed to be this 'perfect' woman who had it all together. So strong in our faith. Biblical scholar.

By week 4, we dropped the masks, started to really reveal who we are. Scared, hurting women so desperately in need of our Savior's love. We each have a story. Not the identical story, but a powerful story nonetheless. It was in 1 women's vulnerability that we were all able to find comfort and peace. Not because she had it worse that us, but because she put a voice to the feelings.

Last night was our last meeting..... it was bittersweet. I really enjoyed diving into the book of James. Great stuff in there... So poignant for my life RIGHT NOW (don't you love how God does that?). I got exactly what I wanted out of the study - a better understanding of God. What I didn't expect in 5 short weeks was a bond with these ladies. A bond so important that we want to continue together.

People always say "Oh, God brought us together" and I do believe that, but this group is truly the definition of that. One lady was assigned to a different table and accidentally sat with us. We kept her the entire time because she was where she was supposed to be.

Getting back to the masks..... we all hide behind them. Some more than others. I find that it is SO much easier for me to be transparent here on my blog. You can't see me. You may not even know me personally. This is safe. Yet to be transparent in real life, the 1st time you meet someone. Frightening!!! However, this experience has challenged me to not hide behind a mask at first meeting. It's scary to put myself out there. Yet I'm hoping it'll be freeing too.

Here's to removing the mask and being myself.

Many blessings,

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